Think you know anxiety? Think again!

 Anxiety is an emotion—one that is made up of thoughts, feelings, and behaviours. But more than that, anxiety is a physiological response. It triggers the body's stress response, preparing it to respond to a perceived threat. And here’s the tricky part: anxious behaviours don’t always look like what we expect.

Maybe anxiety shows up as bedtime struggles, with your child experiencing restless nights. Or perhaps it manifests as anger, conflict, or withdrawal. Does your child appear to be thriving academically or socially, yet their anxiety hides beneath the surface? Even when it’s not obvious, the underlying biology remains the same—the stress response is activated, and the body is on high alert.

When we start viewing anxious behaviours through a biological lens, they begin to make sense. Anxiety isn’t about changing the “challenging” behaviour—it’s about a nervous system that’s dysregulated. And the answer? Bringing that system back into balance.

This can be done in two key ways: through body-based techniques that calm the stress response or through connection. Connection is powerful. It releases oxytocin, a hormone that helps dial down stress and bring the body back to a place of safety. But connection doesn’t have to mean grand gestures or hours of focused attention. Often, it is the way we are with a child, not just the things we do. Sometimes, it’s as simple as a hand squeeze or a conversation where we truly listen—to hear, not just to respond.

Anxious behaviours may hide, but when we shift our focus to what’s happening beneath them, we can shift our response. The antidote to anxiety isn’t just calm—it’s connection.

The Emotions Lab